Put A Leash On That Thing

It's 23 degrees ...

It's dark ...

And there is a deer on the other side of the field wondering why someone would actually CHOOSE to be out here right now.

What else do you expect during a 5:30AM speed session in March?

I will tell you what I wouldn't expect...

I am midway through an agility drill when I hear a noise that makes the hair on the back of my neck stand-up.

The noise is a man sternly screaming "Toby ... Toby ... Get Back Here."

Due to some deep-seated childhood fears, I know exactly what this means.

There is a savage dog on the loose and he is coming for us.

I stop on a dime and quickly turn toward the screaming man.

Through the darkness, I can see a large shadow running across the field right in our direction.

The good news is that the shadow is about 50 yards away.
I am hoping that by the time it gets to us it will be too exhausted to actually do any real damage.

The bad news is that the shadow seems to be picking up both momentum and anger.

The closer it gets, the more I try to figure out how to get mauled and still look tough in front of the guys I am training.

When it's almost too late, the owner finally finds the magic words to make the dog stop dead in its tracks.

With that, he screams the patented, "Don't worry, he won't bite."

These are usually the last words you hear right before someone's dog bites you.

Fortunately, the dog instantly found something else to it wanted to tear to shreds and took off into the darkness.

With all of this, I don't blame the dog.
What do you expect it to do when it sees 4 jacked-up shadows running and grunting in the darkness.

Who I do blame is the owner.

Why let your dog off the leash?

I bet you a million dollars the owner thinks this entire situation was no big deal.

But let me ask you this....

How would that guy feel if he was walking through the park at 5:30 in the morning and our 5'10" 240lb linebacker started running at him screaming like a total lunatic.

How would he feel when this linebacker got about 20 feet away and I yelled ...

"Don't worry. He is not going to punch you in the face."

Exactly ...

Put a Leash on That Thing.

Eat Like A Pig, Get Jacked

For 7 straight days, I consumed approximately 7,000 calories per day.

The net result was 2.5 lbs of muscle gain and virtually no increase in body fat.

How did I do it?

First off, let remind you that I did all of this while staying in an all-inclusive resort in Mexico.
I wasn't climbing Mt. Everest or backpacking through Siberia.

So how did I pull this off ?

Simple ...

1. Trained Daily

Notice I did not say exercise or workout.
I said TRAIN.

I didn't go on the treadmill.

I didn't perform 100 crunches.

I didn't do bicep curls - okay - maybe I did some bicep curls.
I was going to be in a bathing suit all week, don't judge me.

To paint a better picture, here is sample of a training session I would perform.
All sessions were completed in under 45 minutes.

  • Jump Rope (3 sets of 150)
  • Band Warm-Up
  • DB Squat Jumps (Super-set with Hip Adductions and Single Leg RDL's)
  • DB One Arm Chaos Snatch + Overhead Lunge Front to Back 
  • Band Assistance Bench (Super-set with Seated Rows and DB Y's)
  • Core Stabilization 
  • Jump Rope (3 Sets of 150)
  • Stretch

2. Cold Water Sessions

Every morning I sat up to my neck in a freezing cold pool for 20 minutes.

Not impressed?

I was...

I didn't see a single other person willing to stay in this same water for more than a minute.

Why sit in a cold pool?

Lowering your body temperature accelerates fat loss.

If you are not willing to follow what I wrote in The Art of the Cold Shower, maybe this article from a guy from NASA will inspire you --> http://www.wired.com/playbook/2013/02/ff-cold-weight-loss/

3. Drink Water (And Lots of It)

Do I really need to explain this one?

4. Drink Green Tea

I made a concerted effort every day to drink 3 - 4 glasses of green tea.

Green tea helps fight cancer, heart disease, and most importantly (while I am in a bathing suit) - fat gain.

5. Stay Away from Mixed Drinks

If you are under 21, please skip to #6.

It is very tempting to have a pina colada or mudslide while on vacation.
Unfortunately, those things are packed with wasted calories.

I also am a firm believer that drinks with multiple ingredients make you fatter.
I have absolutely no scientific proof of this, but I am sure it's true.

For that reason, if you must drink alcohol during vacation, I recommend you stick to simple drinks like wine or champagne.

6. Eat the Same Food Every Day

Eating the same food every day will help you burn fat.
Once again, I have no scientific evidence to support this.

The only evidence I do have is that I see a correlation between people who are ripped and people who eat the same food all the time.

With that, I did my best to have the same exact food every day except for dinner.

On an all-inclusive vacation, the only variation you have is which restaurant you go to at night.

If I made my wife eat at "El Patio" every night, she would kill me.

Either way, it is easy enough to get some variation of beef and vegetables regardless of which restaurant you select.

7. Eat Lots of Vegetables

I don't want to be gross, but getting waste out of you is as important as getting nutrients in.
This is especially important when you are consuming 7,000 calories a day.

To me, the healthiest way to do this was to load up on mixed vegetables at the buffet during breakfast and lunch.

Going to the buffet line 5 times in one sitting doesn't seem so disgusting when at least one of those plates is filled with squash, carrots, broccoli, and zucchini.

8. Eat Dessert in Moderation

If you are eating 7,000 calories a day, you really do not deserve a Cheat Day.
This does not mean you can't eat any dessert, just don't eat 15 brownies for breakfast, lunch, and dinner.

On this trip, I have to admit that I had dessert 4x - but I did so in moderation.

For me, moderation means allowing my wife to take more than one spoonful of my ice cream without sticking my knife into her hand.


This is how I consumed 7,000 calories a day for a week and gained 2.5 lbs of muscle without gaining any fat. I am not a doctor, nor am I a nutritionist, so I would take this article for what it is worth.

If you do plan on following my advice, I highly recommend you consult your physician before doing so.

All Inclusive Weight Loss

"You are not really going to stay on that stupid diet during OUR vacation, are you?"

The speaker was my wife.

The timid recipient of those "open-minded" words was me.

Before she said that, I actually was planning on staying on my "stupid" diet - The Slow Carb Diet - created by Tim Ferriss in the Four Hour Body.

After she said it, I knew I really didn't have a choice.

I am far from whipped, but I know that messing with my wife's vacation is about as smart as smacking a German Shepherd. 

But how can I break from my diet and not be the fat guy on vacation?

Eat in moderation?

Not gonna happen...

How about this ...
  • I consume approximately 7,000 calories per day for 7 days straight
  • I pack on 2.5lbs of muscle
  • I have virtually no change in body fat (0.2% increase)
How did I do this?

I will detail that in my next post.

5 Reasons I Hate Joe DeFranco

Joe DeFranco is one of the premiere performance enhancement trainers in the world.
If you are looking to prepare for the NFL combine, he is the man.

Unfortunately, there are 5 reasons that I Hate Joe DeFranco.*

Joe DeFranco

1. WWE

I give out a championship belt with WWE guys on it.

DeFranco trains the guys that are actually on the belt.

Triple H at DeFranco's

2. Chaos Training

I am a huge fan of Chaos Training.

DeFranco makes movies with the guy who invented Chaos training, Jim Smith (aka Smitty).

Smitty (pictured right) - The Inventor of Chaos Training

3. The 4 Hour Body

My favorite book is the 4 Hour Body, by Tim Ferriss.

DeFranco is IN the 4 Hour Body, teaching Tim Ferriss how to beat the NFL Combine.

4. MTV - Read World, Road Rules Challenge

My favorite reality TV show is MTV's Real World, Road Rules Challenge.

My Favorite Show
DeFranco trains people that are actually on the show MTV's Real World, Road Rules Challenge.

Kenny (pictured right) from Real World, Road Rules Challenge

5. Billy Blanco

Billy Blanco (pictured left) - soon to be famous

Yeah ... it's the same picture from #4.

The guy on the left is Billy Blanco.

Billy is one of my favorite people on this earth.

He is a true leader, he is charismatic, and his bench press is legendary.

He left Advanced Training last summer to train at DeFranco's.
It definitely hurt my ego, but I understood his reasons.

True to his character, he called me before it happened and told me why.
Most people would have just not shown up and never said anything.

In the video below, Billy is the spotter.
The guy benching (Joe Igneri) is going head to head with Billy in a "Bench Off".

Watch the video below and tell me you wouldn't want Billy on your team or in your weight room.
(Note: Due to Blanco's motivational tactics, Igneri actually won this bench off.)

* Disclaimer: Before any of Joe D's disciples drive to Staten Island to rip my head off ...I really do not hate Joe DeFranco. This article was written purely for entertainment purposes. His teachings have been a huge influence on what we do at Advanced Training and I can only hope to have 1/2 the success he has had in this "industry".