Put A Leash On That Thing

It's 23 degrees ...

It's dark ...

And there is a deer on the other side of the field wondering why someone would actually CHOOSE to be out here right now.

What else do you expect during a 5:30AM speed session in March?

I will tell you what I wouldn't expect...

I am midway through an agility drill when I hear a noise that makes the hair on the back of my neck stand-up.

The noise is a man sternly screaming "Toby ... Toby ... Get Back Here."

Due to some deep-seated childhood fears, I know exactly what this means.

There is a savage dog on the loose and he is coming for us.

I stop on a dime and quickly turn toward the screaming man.

Through the darkness, I can see a large shadow running across the field right in our direction.

The good news is that the shadow is about 50 yards away.
I am hoping that by the time it gets to us it will be too exhausted to actually do any real damage.

The bad news is that the shadow seems to be picking up both momentum and anger.

The closer it gets, the more I try to figure out how to get mauled and still look tough in front of the guys I am training.

When it's almost too late, the owner finally finds the magic words to make the dog stop dead in its tracks.

With that, he screams the patented, "Don't worry, he won't bite."

These are usually the last words you hear right before someone's dog bites you.

Fortunately, the dog instantly found something else to it wanted to tear to shreds and took off into the darkness.

With all of this, I don't blame the dog.
What do you expect it to do when it sees 4 jacked-up shadows running and grunting in the darkness.

Who I do blame is the owner.

Why let your dog off the leash?

I bet you a million dollars the owner thinks this entire situation was no big deal.

But let me ask you this....

How would that guy feel if he was walking through the park at 5:30 in the morning and our 5'10" 240lb linebacker started running at him screaming like a total lunatic.

How would he feel when this linebacker got about 20 feet away and I yelled ...

"Don't worry. He is not going to punch you in the face."

Exactly ...

Put a Leash on That Thing.


Michael Mazalatis said...

Anyone get bit? I know a lawyer ;)

George Mahoney said...

Fortunately for us, the dog found something else to terrorize before it tried to attack us.